Archive | Commentaries

Denise Milani: Boobs…They’re What’s for Dinner.

We at Steak Army are fascinated with Denise Milani. We have dedicated an entire research team to the question of why average males turn into a whimpering fool when shown pictures of this outstanding female specimen. After countless hours of calculated, empirical experimentation that would make Harvard Medical School jealous, Steak Army finally has an […]

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Posted in Featured Posts, Girls That Make My Penis Cry0 Comments

A Song About My Favorite Hobby

Make sure to stay strong and power through the first minute of this parody. It is a well made piece of lyrical art that will make sure you are up to date with today’s terminology for “choking your chicken.” Feel free to “take your sausage hostage” afterwards. Just make sure to shut your drapes so […]

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Posted in Featured Videos, Hysterical, Humorous, and All Around Funny....0 Comments

Another Slutty Chicken Joke…

A chicken farmer went to a local bar, sat next to a woman and ordered a glass of champagne. The woman perked up and said, “How about that? I just ordered a glass of champagne, too!” “What a coincidence?” the farmer said. “This is a special day for me. I am celebrating.” “This is a […]

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Big Brother Loves Facebook

I am a paranoid individual. I shred my snail mail, use an IP address blocker, and never use condoms because of the possibility of nano-processors installed during manufacturing that can track my deviant sexual behavior. Social networking sites are no exception when it comes to big brother’s heavy hands and prying eyes. Put on your […]

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Posted in Featured Videos, The Life and Times as a Citizen of this World0 Comments

Jessica Alba Owes Me a Keyboard

Every man knows who Jessica Alba is. Because every man knows who she is, every woman knows as well. She has starred in some pretty good movies and has done some horrible ones as well. Either way she is partly responsible for my premature “habits.” Enjoy the photo set and make sure your keyboards are […]

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Could Things Be Any Worse?

According to Rep. Paul Kanjorski of Pennsylvania the answer to the above question is a resounding, “Fuck yeah! Things could be really, really bad. I mean Mad Max, Road Warrior bad.” He didn’t exactly say those words but we here at Steak Army felt that a layman’s translation to this informative and eye opening video […]

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Posted in Featured Videos, The Attempt to Pay for Food and Shelter while Drinking and Paying for Sex0 Comments

Where NOT to Vacation

Airplanes seem to be falling out of the sky lately.  In reality planes crash pretty much all the time on a global scale.  Whether they are large commercial jets or small single engine craft that weigh less than your fat aunt Helga, gravity will eventually catch up and smash you in the face with the […]

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Kate Beckinsale: She’s English AND Hot

I first saw Kate Beckinsale in the movie “Underworld.”  She wore tight black leather and killed werewolves for a living by slicing their heads in half at the mouth. For three months after its release, I wore a werewolf costume at home hoping she would break down the door in all of her attractive glory. […]

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