Featured Stories
Death by Ketchup!!! Denise Milani: Boobs Kate Beckinsale: She Megan Fox is Going Scarlett Johansson Olga Kurylenko: Russia, you I am fat, hear me roar!
 

Death by Ketchup!!!

Ketchup will kill us all! As I sat there tearing into an outstanding hunk of steak between two pieces of buttered bread, I thought about Ketchup. It’s not that I didn’t have any for my deliciously tremendous potato wedges that came with my meal. I actually had an ample supply. And in between taking bites […]

Denise Milani: Boobs…They’re What’s for Dinner.

We at Steak Army are fascinated with Denise Milani. We have dedicated an entire research team to the question of why average males turn into a whimpering fool when shown pictures of this outstanding female specimen. After countless hours of calculated, empirical experimentation that would make Harvard Medical School jealous, Steak Army finally has an […]

Kate Beckinsale: She’s English AND Hot

I first saw Kate Beckinsale in the movie “Underworld.”  She wore tight black leather and killed werewolves for a living by slicing their heads in half at the mouth. For three months after its release, I wore a werewolf costume at home hoping she would break down the door in all of her attractive glory. […]

Megan Fox is…Foxy

There was this movie called “Transformers.”  It stars the incredibly hot bodied Megan Fox.  I honeslty couldn’t tell you anything else about this damn movie except that it starred some other people and featured a yellow car at some point.  I’ve seen this flick three times and still have no clue what the plot is.  […]

Going “Commando”

I recently visited the local supermarket to pick up a few required ingredients for that night’s dinner. I normally bypass the produce section as my body is allergic to all fruits and vegetables. I am lucky to have a body that performs best when fueled purely with the flesh of animals. This particular market required […]

Scarlett Johansson …Yummy!

There are a lot of gorgeous women in Hollywood. But Scarlett has a fantastic girl next door look that will leave you speechless and naked on the corner because you blindly gave her everything you own. Yes I think she is that hot. Unfortunately she stars in the just released movie “The Spirit” which is […]

Olga Kurylenko: Russia, you’ve gone and done good.

Olga Kurylenko was in the movie “Hitman.” I instantly decided that a trip to Russia was in order based on the fantasy that every girl there was in some way from the same spectacular gene pool. Of course these plans fell to the wayside due to the economic turmoil that followed. These are the, “I’m […]

I am fat, hear me roar!

As I drove by the gym the other day, of which I am a proud member, I realized that this country is obsessed with being in shape. I also realized by the amount of fat walking on the sidewalk that we are also the most out of shape donkeys in the world. Now I say […]

DJ got skills….

07 March 2012

Dubstep… I personally can’t stand it. But then I watched AraabMuzik completely blow my mind with this set. Despite his skills, the best part of this video’s offerings is a single comment that has magically made its way to every copy of this clip: “He once fingered a girl. Now she’s dead.”

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The Flip Side

07 February 2012

What is this video exactly? Imagine a world where hot Southern California girls are infected with a virus that gives them the mentality of a testosterone driven man while still retaining their feminine lady bits. Or just watch below and give director Jay Diaz the praise he deserves as he switches the roles of men […]

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The Daily Show and the truth about Newt Gingrich

25 January 2012

You can always rely on Jon Stewart of “The Daily Show” to say what is on his mind. Although truthfully, he probably has an entire squad of writers feverishly imagining ridiculous ways to express the state of the world and especially the mockery that is the 2012 presidential race. So I do give credit to […]

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Posted in Featured Videos, Hysterical, Humorous, and All Around Funny...., The Life and Times as a Citizen of this World26 Comments

Blood, Sweat, Tears, and more Blood

12 January 2012

We at Steak Army are huge proponents of the military and the men and women serving. We may not support the political use of this honorable profession, but we do support those who are willing to die for the person on their left and right that they call brother or sister. In that light, here […]

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Stress Relief = The Squirrel Catapult

25 December 2011

Squirrels are cute, fuzzy, and like to forage for nuts. They also carry rabies, the plague, and ticks that can kill with Lyme disease. Meanwhile, your pet minions will bring them to you as a sacrifice in hopes of receiving continued food, shelter, and belly rubbings from their deity. Rid yourself of these furry devils […]

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Holy Sh** at 11,000 Feet

13 December 2011

There are a lot of things to be afraid of in this world. Apparently, falling out of a plane is one of them. Skip to 2:20 if your ADD is on overdrive and can’t wait to see the mayhem.

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Mechanical Bulls Have Feelings Too…

29 November 2011

…and by feelings we mean weight limits. Make sure to watch till the cliffhanger of an ending!

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Chimps = Undercover Muscle

18 June 2011

There have been some very notable media capturing events concerning our younger brothers on the evolutionary scale. Most notably, a roving gang of chimpanzees ripped off a man’s testicles while at the zoo. Soon after, a female had her face removed by her adopted son who happened to be a chimp. What is the reoccurring […]

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